ROBINHOOD CHAIN · PAIRED WITH TOKENIZED $GLD

Lose weight.
Gain gold.

$OZEMPIG trades against tokenized $GLD. Every trade burns calories, buries gold, and funds her weight loss journey.

No roadmap. No yield. One very public weigh-in.

OZEMPIG at maximum launch weight with an oxygen cannula
Current formLaunch weight
0.00%burned
$OZEMPIG TBA
$GLD 0xC9a981…BFC4e

LIVE · BODY & BANK CHECK

The public weigh-in.

Only the form she has actually earned is public. Every future look stays sealed until the burn unlocks it.

Supply burned0.00%

0 permanently removed

Gold buried$GLD

Permanent community vault

Remaining supply1.00B

Started at one billion

Next transformation

Sealed until 0.25% burned
Awaiting launch

THE TREATMENT

Three things.
Then you’re caught up.

She does not count calories. The contracts do.

01

Trade against gold.

$OZEMPIG trades directly against tokenized $GLD in a Uniswap v4 pool on Robinhood Chain.

02

Burn calories.

Forty percent of collected OZEMPIG-side fees is burned forever. Supply only gets leaner.

03

Bury the gold.

Eighty percent of collected GLD-side fees enters a permanent vault with no withdrawal function.

AFTER THE PROTOCOL CUT

Simple in.
Simple out.

An immutable router applies the same split every time. Anyone can crank it. Nobody can withdraw the community vault.

Fees collected in $GLD

80%Permanent vault20%Creator

Fees collected in $OZEMPIG

40%Burned40%Vault20%Creator

VERIFY, DON’T TRUST

Contracts before calories.

Every live contract address is listed here for public verification.

Token
TBA
Pool
TBA
Fee router
TBA
Gold vault
TBA

JOIN THE GROUP THERAPY

Burn calories.
Stack gold.

Follow the weigh-ins, contract drops, and increasingly deranged jewelry choices.

$OZEMPIG is a memecoin paired with tokenized $GLD on Robinhood Chain. It does not represent ownership of gold, and holders cannot redeem vault assets. No yield or profit is promised. Not financial advice. Unaffiliated parody; not associated with Novo Nordisk, Ozempic, SPDR, State Street, or Robinhood.